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August 12, 2010

Do What you say…and your children will do as you do!

Hello my fabulous friends!

This will be the last time I will share Diva Tips with you on our Diva Speaks blog.  Going forward, if you would like to receive Diva Tips and News please sign in by using the opt in box on the right.  You will then receive my fabulous newsletter directly in your mailbox two times per month!  In the upcoming weeks I will be sharing some exciting information with you and ramping up our Diva work.  I am beyond jazzed about finding my love of video as a way of staying in touch with you all. In my post below…you will hear how that happened.  It was life changing for me.  The end result is I did something I was not comfortable with and fell in love with the process.  So, you will be hearing and seeing much more of me in future posts and newsletters.  Enjoy this edition of Diva Tips and please leave comments below.  I just love hearing your thoughts…your experiences…your lessons learned.  I look forward to starting some fabulous conversations here…it is our very own special place to connect!  xoxo

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Diva Tip

Do as you say…and your children will do as you do

Did you hear that Oprah called?  Well….she didn’t call me.  For those of you who may have missed it, Oprah held a contest for people who wanted to “win” their own talk show.  I entered the contest and was touched and amazed at the support I received and the number of people who voted for me.  Unfortunately, I did not place in the top three…and Oprah will not be calling.  Not yet anyway! But, the experience taught a valuable lesson worth far more than winning an Oprah contest.  If you missed it, here it is.

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I wanted to take the time to thank all of you who supported me and took the time to watch and vote on my video.  More importantly, I wanted to share the entire “behind the scenes” story with you, and a very big lesson I have learned.

Like many women who share my passion of helping others, I have always admired and wished to emulate Oprah.  It is my secret dream to have my own show and take my message to a larger platform.  The truth is, I know I can do it…and I know I can do it well.  So, when the contest became available I spoke about making the entry video for several weeks.  Yet, I never took action.  Then one day, the little diva asked me when I was going to make the video.  I answered honestly, telling her I have a fear of really putting myself out there…fear of the camera…fear of the judging…fear of losing.

And this is what my little diva told me…and I quote, “But mommy…you tell your clients all of the time that they need to step out of their fear and into their greatness…you need to do the same thing.  You have always wanted to be on Oprah, and now you can get your own show.  You must do it”.

Wow…can you say wow?

So there I was….wishing to emulate Oprah.  And, there was the little diva…emulating me and what I teach every single day.  I was called out by her… I was not doing what I say…and I was asking everyone around me, including my children, to do as I say…not as I do.

What choice did I have now?  I took action.  The little diva was my film crew, my makeup artist and my director.  The entire video was her production.  With two days left until the deadline and because my daughter had taught me a very big lesson, I made a video, uploaded it and entered the contest. Many people who entered the contest had elaborate videos….and then there was mine…simply produced with love by my eleven year old daughter.  I could not be more proud.  My mantra?  Go ahead judge me…I am fabulous.

So what was the lesson learned?  It is this….Do as you say and your children will learn to do what you do.

As a parent, I can tell you that I was amazed that my daughter was listening and learning from me when I was not looking.  It is during the everyday moments of life that our children can learn the most.  They are watching and listening to our every word and action.  I have spoken of this for years while working with parents.  It was not until this experience that I fully came to appreciate the value of this lesson.

So I ask you…do your children emulate you?  Do you like what you see?  If not, take a closer look at your actions and words….and remember, we are our children’s best educators.  Lead by example and don’t ask them to only do as you say…help them to see that what you say is really what you do.

Remember….we are all role models to our children, our friends, our peers and the world.  We must not only talk the talk…but we must put on our most fabulous shoes and walk the walk!

Go! Divas! Go!

xoxo

Dabney

Diva Coach Dabney

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LOVED LOVED LOVED this article Dabney!!! SO true and the best part was that you heard what your daughter was saying. She sounds like a wise girl and has an AWESOME mom! I think you will make it to tv one day.

Out of the mouths of babes... they are our biggest teachers of who we are being. Glad you had the courage and humility to listen. Excellent post... will be sharing this one! xo —Stephanie

Dabney, YOU ROCK!

You are the best role model for your children. You are continuously stepping out of your comfort zone and stretching yourself. You are an inspiration!

XOXO
Vic Maranto

Dabney you Bombshell you!! Thank you for stepping out in a BIG way my dear. I am so proud of you!!
XOXO
Gigi Belmonico

So much of parenting is by osmosis! You may not have won an "Oprah" show, but you gave your daughter an experience and a memory that will last a lifetime--you really did win! xo ~Deesha

I am one of your biggest fans... and was impressed you took the action to be one of the few who made an Oprah video... charming. You are a great role model... not just for kids, but for everyone. Your positive approach to life's situations is infectious... Go Diva!

Dabney, I just loved this post. Parenting sometimes shows up when the child 'parents' back... You have obviously poured greatness into your little diva, she completely understands walking into greatness. It's great to see that you stepped right into it, got in gear, and modeled beautifully what a true woman of greatness does when things don't turn out as they thought they would. They keep going, and believing. Loved the post, please keep them coming. xo

Sometimes it is hard to remember not to say "Do as I say, not as I do" but practice makes perfect!!!

Rock it Diva!

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